Well I have just the answer for you, my friend!  Many "Meat and Potatoes Loyalists" may know that I used to write several years ago for a small newsmagazine located in the People's Republic of Massachusetts.  When I escaped to East Tennessee (aka God's Country) in the late 90's, I left my polemic desires in storage with the rest of my things.  My column was called "A View Through These Two Eyes" and one month I featured an article on how driving habits can be changed by intellectuals who want to help the environment, help our country and best of all, SAVE CASH BIG TIME!  Keep in mind that this was in 1996, when gasoline prices were about 95 cents a gallon.  Now, with gas at about $2.85 and rising....AGAIN, I thought it might be a nice change of pace to dust off the ideas I presented 11 years ago.  The next time you find yourself WHINING about the high price of gas, ask yourself how your driving habits are affecting the situation.  Enjoy!
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A View Through These Two Eyes  (Originally published in "Southwoods" magazine, 9/10/1996)

Those of you who have visited Charleston, SC will no doubt remember the Mark Clark Expressway.  Its two huge ribbons of concrete make their way over several towering bridges which provide breathtaking views of the penninsula and many surrounding waterways.

One day I was driving home enjoying this scenery when all of the sudden I saw a red flash in the corner of my left eye!  With cat-like reflexes (yeah, right!) I instinctively began applying my brakes and swerving into the break-down lane.  The red flash had been a little Geo Storm, so close in fact that it looked as if it was in the front seat with me!  The reckless fool had just cut me off while going for the same exit.  I thought to myself, "The nerve of that guy!  I'm going to follow that jerk and give him a piece of my mind."  We turned left at the bottom of the ramp and I thought "Great, we're headed toward the house, I won't have too far to go after I get done 'flame spraying' him!"  Then we both turned into my neighborhood and I thought "Wow!  Think of the chances, this hazard to human life lives closer than I would have liked."  Imagine my shock and horror when "the jerk" turned out to be my NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR!

I was blown away with amazement!  This sweet lady, who I've waved to dozens of times had just threatened the safety of me and my "Sweet G".  (That's my car for those that don't know.)  Needless to say, I never did give that neighbor a piece of my infuriated mind.  

I have always been intrigued by the transformation that takes place when people climb in "behind the wheel".  Normally sedate individuals turn into ranting and raving lunatics when someone is going only 5 miles per hour OVER the speed limit!  Sometimes I find myself undergoing this change when I'm behind schedule which is almost always.  I have to step outside myself and think "You're doing it again, RELAX!"  Then I'm all set for another couple of minutes....

The popular musician Sting, summed up our society's driving woes best when he wrote the song lyric:  "Packed like lemmings into shiny metal boxes, contestants in a suicidal race."  For many people, daily driving is a race!  A race to get to work on time, a race to get home 5 minutes earlier than usual or a race to beat everyone to the next stoplight.  Do I even need to mention how silly and wasteful this is?  A few years back, when I lived in the Boston suburb of Waltham, I set up a little experiment with a friend of mine to prove a point.  We were to drive from work to my house and would both leave at the same time during the afternoon commute.  The twist was that one of us would drive like a suicidal maniac while the other would take it slow and easy.  Any guesses on who made it home first?  Of course it was the maniac.  By cutting people off, speeding and running red lights he made it home a whopping 2 minutes earlier.  Now that was surely worth it!

There's a section of route 20 in Westfield, MA that must average a stoplight every quarter mile.   When driving on roads like this, I'm looking 1 or 2 stoplights ahead to see their effect on traffic flow.  If I see a light turning red up ahead, I place my car in neutral, coast up to it and save my brakes, clutch and gas.  Others will go blazing by or impatiently ride my back bumper.  Do these people see the red light up ahead?  I guess not.  The point here is simple, when driving just as in life, always be looking down the road.

Another thing I do that tends to bother impatient types is when I'm stuck in stop and go traffic.  Rather than beat my car with continuous starts and stops, I'll leave 4 or 5 car-lengths of space ahead of me.  That way, I can keep rolling along even if the traffic ahead comes to a complete stop.  By the time I catch up to them, they've started moving again.  Since I don't stop moving, I save brakes, clutch, gas and the muscles in my left leg!  You may have seen truckers do this on the highway, it's a great idea!  The drawback is that short-sighted jokers will cut in front of you because they just have to move up that additional 100 feet of distance.  Somehow it escapes these people that cutting in and out of traffic gets them to their destination no quicker.  Maybe they do it purely for their own entertainment, who knows.

Whatever the reasons people drive the way they do, they're not likely to change much after reading this article.  It will most likely take years of personal experiences to change behavior that has become so habitual.  Maybe an accident, a few tickets or the mellowing effects of growing older (and wiser).  These will all have much more of an impact than a few silly ideas from some guy who vents his spleen on a monthly basis.  But just remember, the next time you roar up to a stoplight and slam on your brakes, there might be a car that coasts right by you as the light turns green.  That'll be me!